I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama!

BECOMING AN ENGINEER

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Wed, 22 Feb 2012 19:00:56 +0000

Did you know that I have an engineering degree? Really, from the University of Tulsa in 1979! I think this poem says all you need to know about why.

BECOMING AN ENGINEER

I’ve studied every day for just about four years

Because they say it takes that long to make us engineers.

I passed math and physics, got an “A” in chemistry,

And lots of things I didn’t know now make sense to me.

I can write a program and tell computers what to do

But why I have to know this stuff I haven’t got a clue.

It’s just a lot of clutter filling up my brain

When all I really want to know

IS HOW TO DRIVE THAT TRAIN!

Byron von Rosenberg © April 2, 2011 St. Louis Zoo

GEORGE WASHINGTON FROG

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Mon, 20 Feb 2012 19:37:47 +0000

I DON’T LIKE COFFEE!

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 20:08:39 +0000

I don’t like coffee! I don’t like tea!

They just don’t taste that good to me.

I won’t drink ‘em! Not one sip!

If they’re too hot they’ll burn my lip!

Why’d they make drinks so bitter?

It tastes like they used kitty litter!

But it’s so hard to get up.

THINK I’LL HAVE ANOTHER CUP!

Byron von Rosenberg © Stars to Chase 2010

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 14:12:49 +0000

Here’s a little love poem from my book, Stars to Chase.

ALL THE TEA IN CHINA

All the tea in China! All the cats in Siam!

The gold in ol’ Fort Knox! That’s how in love I am.

I used to think that I could be in love – oh, just a little! -

But now I’ve jumped the fence without stopping in the middle.

It’s a whole new attitude that’s inside me now

And the police say I feel better than the local laws allow!

It’s all because of you, your smile, your laugh, your touch!

And because you told me you love me twice as much!

For all the cats in Siam and all of China’s tea

Don’t mean half as half as much as does your love for me!

Byron von Rosenberg © Stars to Chase 2012

WHAT THE ELEPANT FORGOT

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 19:00:44 +0000

Another student at Westhoff asked for an elephant poem so here is one from Stars to Chase:

It forgot that its great big ears might make some people laugh.

It forgot it wasn’t skinny and tall like a giraffe.

It forgot that it was strange to have a trunck shaped like a hose

So it forgot to chuckle when it looked at your big nose.

But it remembered sunrise that opened up this day

And it remembered happiness that’s found in work and play.

It remembered power, how strong that it can be,

And all those things together somehow reminded me

That elephants and people can travel very far

When they forget their differences and remember who they are.

Byron von Rosenberg © Stars to Chase 2010

THE END OF THE BOOK – A RHINO POEM

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 02:04:21 +0000

One of the students at Westhoff Elementary School wanted a rhino poem and another one wanted another bat poem so here’s one with both animals from the end of my book, Thinking Upside Down.

Don’t stop to look! It’s the end of the book!

The fables and stories are through

Though there’s a theory that they’re a very white bat

But how can we tell if it’s true?

These pages would hide and albino.

Yet there’s a rumor I’ve heard (I think it’s absurd)

That there’s also a giant white rhino.

It has a perfect disguise ’til it opens its eyes.

It runs in a great cloud of dust.

If you see that I suppose this book you will close

For if you value your life then you must.

But even things strange like a rhino can change

As life takes them through joy and sorrow.

And if this book that you read put new thoughts in your head

I hope you’ll read it again tomorrow!

REVISED: AN ODE TO A STORE

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 02:10:40 +0000

This past Sunday a family came into the store delighted to finally find the llama book! The “baby” was three now, and Mom had seen the book when she was pregnant with him. What a delight it was to have a store where she could get the book she wanted to read to her son!

Then three young men from the Greater St. Louis Church came in. They saw that I was trying to remodel the store by myself and offered to assist. What a precious gift that was! Thank you, Ryan, Peter and Alex! Everyone who visits the store now will be blessed by your kindness.

And so I hope the store will be a blessing to you this year as we continue our adventure at Chesterfield Mall. Authors and illustrators are invited to share their books and hold signings, and I’ll have that many more chances to recite and be inspired by our guests.

I altered the poem to the present and future tenses because the store miraculously has both! See you soon at “I Don’t Want to Kiss a Llama!” or at www.idontwanttokissallama.com !

REVISED: AN ODE TO A STORE

Like everything on earth its days are numbered few

For a lifetime lifts as quickly as the morning dew.

Yet as I sit so quietly and people march on past

I sense this store’s impression is one that’s made to last.

More than bricks and mortar there is a spirit here

That people will remember. It fills their hearts with cheer.

And anything that does such an awesome thing

Will live again like blossoms blooming in the spring.

For sometime in the future an idea someone caught

Will manifest itself becoming more than thought.

“Just a little store.” “Such a silly name!”

Yet calls out through the ages, “My life will not be tame!”

“For even though I’m only a tiny little store

The passions I instill will live forevermore!”

BUT THE STORE IS STILL OPEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 03:09:05 +0000

I wrote the previous poem last month when I thought we’d be closing the “I Don’t Want to Kiss a Llama!” store in Chesterfield Mall. Turns out IT IS STILL OPEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I like what the poem has to say and I’m leaving it on the blog, but WE ARE OPEN. This month I will be at the store Fridays and Saturdays from 6 pm to 9 pm and Sundays from 1 pm to 5 pm. We will be closed the last weekend in February however.

We are looking for authors who need a home for their book (consignment) and would like to have a book signing.

Let us hear from you!

AN ODE TO A STORE

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 06:01:12 +0000

We were going to have to close the store until a miracle occurred. Now we have a lease for another year! Hooray!

I wrote this poem in a melancholy mood but I rather like what it says so I’m leaving it on the blog. DON’T BE CONFUSED. THE STORE IS STILL OPEN!

Like everything on earth its days are numbered few

For a lifetime lifts as quickly as the morning dew.

Yet as I sit so quietly and people march on past

I sense this store’s impression is one that’s made to last.

More than bricks and mortar there is a spirit here

That people will remember. It filled their hearts with cheer.

And anything that does such an awesome thing

Will live again like blossoms blooming in the spring.

For sometime in the future an idea someone caught

Will manifest itself becoming more than thought.

“Just a little store.” “Such a silly name!”

Yet calls out through the ages, “My life will not be tame!”

“For even though I was only a short-lived little store

The passions I instilled will live forevermore!”

ARNOT AND ARTU, THE LLAMAS FROM FRANCE

I Don't Want to Kiss a Llama! — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 00:50:49 +0000

Arnot and Artu were llamas from France

who couldn’t agree on their cans and their can’ts.

Arnot would say “NO!” to his sister Artu

who ended up taking the opposite view.

The subject in question never did matter

and their arguments ended in spit and in spatter

Until on the day Arnot realized

if he’d agree with his sister they’d both be surprised.

Artu was amazed and responded in kind

and if you’d do the same I think that you’d find

That the people who love you are worth taking that chance

Like Arnot and Artu, the llamas from France!